Man Rushes back into Major Apartment Fire after Forgetting Body Pillow

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(The following is satire).

On Sunday, A major apartment fire occurred near downtown, causing everyone within roughly 10 blocks to evacuate. However, according to multiple eyewitness reports, one man decided to rush back into the flames after being evacuated. Luckily, he managed to make it back out. According to the man in question, James Alton, he rushed back inside to get what he described as “valuable cargo.” “I couldn’t just let my Asuna Zero-Two body pillow get burned to ashes, I paid almost 200 dollars for my favorite waifu.” Alton later added that he managed to retrieve other items, such as a Rei Ayanami figure and an Eureka Seven wall scroll. Alton also managed to escape with only 3rd Degree burns. “It was worth it, those are my babies.”


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